The Lord is My Rock

“I love you, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; 

my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge.”  Psalm 18:1-2

I've been in awe of the Grand Canyon since my parents took me there when I was nine.  I remember being afraid of falling into it, and when I took my own children there thirty years later I was a bit nervous that my nine year old son might live out that fear.  Yet the beauty of the vast rock drew me, and viewing it from the safe distance of the South Rim no longer satisfied.   A year ago, my daughter Sarah and I braved the challenge of hiking to the bottom of the canyon and back.  The trip down took almost 3 ½ hours, and my knees took a beating. The next morning my calves were so tight that I couldn't take a step down without hurting.  Thankfully there was nowhere to go but up.  The way back out was grueling, and took more than 5 hours.  At times I thought I wouldn't make it, but my lovely athletic girl coached me not to look at how much further we had to climb, but just look at the path directly ahead.  The muscle pain and fatigue (lasting several days!) was well worth the experience of meeting the physical challenge.  Now I've enjoyed the beauty of the Grand Canyon up close.

That year I was also climbing out of a deep emotional canyon, as I experienced the pain of my marriage ending.  As I struggled with the process of forgiveness, my wise counselor told me I needed to ask God to bring to mind the memories of hurt, and write them out.  He coached me to write down three things: what happened, how it made me feel, and what it taught me about myself.  I resisted this idea for some time; I knew it would be painful and I didn't want to relieve those moments.   But I also didn't want to stay in the bottom of the canyon of grief, so I reluctantly started the journey.  When I processed those memories over time I was able to identity several lies that I believed as a result of those experiences:

I am unwanted, unloved.

I have no voice, no impact.

I am not worth protecting.    

                                           

I took those lies to the truth of God’s word, and found verses that counteracted them.  Through Jeremiah 31:1 the Lord told me “I have loved you with an everlasting love”, and in Isaiah 41:9 “I have chosen you and have not rejected you.”  Other verses reminded me that I am “anointed to preach good news” (Isaiah 61), I am a strong woman because Christ strengthens me (Philippians 4:13), and my Lord “protects the unwary; when I was brought low, he saved me.” (Psalm 116:6)

These are solid truths that I can hold on to, rocks that I can stand upon.  In order to remember them, I wrote each truth on a rock, and placed them in a glass jar that I keep in my bedroom.  When I doubt my value or am discouraged about my circumstances, I can pick up a rock and read the truth about how God sees me.  He is my Rock, in whom I take refuge. 

Marsha Craig 

Sing a New Song

“The Lord is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation.

He is my God, and I will praise Him.”  Exodus 15:2 NIV

                When we last wrote about the Israelites, they had just experienced a miracle – God parted the Red Sea and they walked through on dry ground, with a wall of water on their right and on their left.  What they thought was a dead end (a huge body of water on one side and angry Egyptians on the other) became an unlikely path of freedom.  The entire army of Pharaoh that had followed to recapture them was swept away.  God had fought for them; He kept His promise that seemed too good to be true when they were discouraged from being treated harshly.  Their natural response was to sing.

Sitting with Grandpa,
the old piano in the background

 I have a love for music, not as a performer, but as an emotional outlet.  I learned to play the piano as a little girl, on an old upright that has been in my family for four generations.  I used to make up little songs about Jesus and sing my heart out, unconcerned about who was listening with the confidence that comes with childhood.  I realized I didn't have such a good voice in 5^th grade when my sister and her best friend taped me singing to my favorite eight track tape while wearing headphones.  They played it back, laughing, and I was surprised to hear how bad I sounded.  But I still sing my heart out, in church and in my car, just not when people are listening.

Music was a lifeline to me when I was going through the worst pain of my divorce.  I downloaded worship songs to my I-phone and lay in bed at night with my headphones on, trying to soothe my heart and get some rest when sleep was wouldn’t come.  I played the same songs over and over:  songs that reminded me of God’s love and promises to rescue.  Most were contemplative songs, songs of brokenness, and songs of lament that expressed my grief and helped me to hold on to the God who promised to bring me through. 

              I imagine the Israelites had familiar songs they sang while working as slaves in Egypt, making bricks.  They had many years of harsh labor which only got worse after Moses arrived, and each time things looked bleak they played the same tapes over and over.   When they were backed up to the Red Sea they didn't expect God to rescue them.  They told Moses “Didn't we say to you in Egypt, ‘Leave us alone; let us serve the Egyptians’?”  But their tune changed dramatically when God did the unexpected and rescued them.  God not only gave them something to sing about, He became their song.

                I can relate.  Like the Israelites, what I thought was a dead end has become an unlikely path of freedom for me.  I no longer feel deserted and abandoned.  God has been so good to me.  He’s given me a new place to call home that I love, deepened my relationship with family and friends, and made the money I have stretch to meet all my needs.  Recently, I realized my I-phone playlist no longer fits.  I have a new song in my heart that is light and upbeat.  It’s time to go back to I-tunes and download some new songs.

Beautifully restored, the old piano sits in my new living room 

                Do you have a new song to sing?  Has God brought you through something hard that you thought was a dead end?  Don’t forget to stop and savor the victory, even if it’s a small one.  Sing a new song, even if it doesn't sound good to others.  Change up your playlist, and share it with your Sistahs.