My Price

"But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners” Romans 5:8 NLT

I am very much a planner, in every sense of the fashion. Color codes, schedules, labels are like my drug of choice; I love to organize. In 2011 Fred and I were in premarital classes at church, but not yet engaged. So one day on the way to lunch from church I asked, “What else do we need to do before getting engaged?” (I was totally fishing for a timeline.. I told you I was a planner) Fred mentioned two things, save up money to buy a ring and save up money to give my parents in exchange for me.

Confusion! Exchange? That doesn’t sound right. I knew about saving up money for a ring (I had some of those picked out... I was ready), but giving my parents money in exchange for me? I wasn’t really sure of what that meant or what that looked like. I even thought, only to myself, that the “exchange” kinda sounded like slavery... Just saying… So I asked Fred “What do you mean give my parents money in exchange for me? Fred went on to say that in his Kenyan culture you would give a gift to the parents of the bride when you became engaged based on what you think your bride is worth, as a blessing and an offering for raising her. That it was meant to be a compliment.

It didn’t sound so bad after all… except I was terrified to find out how much he thought I was worth. Too low- would be awkward and make me feel devalued, too high- who knows when we would be able to afford to get married. And I was in planning mode! I never did ask the amount, and still to this day I’m still not sure I want to know.

I had two thoughts about the “bride price” he wanted to pay for me. The first, which I mentioned to him, is that I had a desire to be a gift to him. I wanted to be a blessing to Fred. I desired to be his helper, which in my mind didn’t fit with having to pay my worth to my parents.

The second I didn’t mention and kept to myself, is that I had a fear. I was afraid that one day he would regret the “price” he paid for me. That maybe he would want a refund or exchange. That somehow it would come to play in a disagreement or argument “I should have never paid your parents that much.” I feared later it would be a topic of hurt.

Now, if you have met Fred for more than 2 minutes, you would know that these thoughts of mine are SOOOOO far from his character and irrational. I realized I was being insecure…I’m happy to say that Fred saved up money for that ring, and I was able to plan that wedding.  And, no he never paid the bride price to my parents, although my mom still insists “they could have used that money”!  (of course she is joking!)

How much do you think someone would be willing to pay to be in a relationship with you?   What are you worth?  The Bible says that God loved you so much, he paid the ultimate price, the life of His one and only son in exchange for you.  Jesus died on a cross, paying the debt for our sins, so that we could be “His bride”.  Sistah’s, let’s not miss the compliment!  Let’s not be insecure!  Let’s walk in confidence knowing that the King of Kings has chosen us to be His forever and ever.  Amen.

Question:  What else could God do to show you how much you are worth to Him?  

-- Kelsey Amusavi

Belonging to God

“…you are not your own, you were bought at a price..” I Cor 6:19

Did you catch the Oscars last Sunday?   12 Years A Slave star Lupita Nyong’o won “Best Supporting Actress.”  I was thrilled; it was by far my favorite movie last year.  A true story, it highlights the painful abuse inflicted on black slaves by southern plantation owners in early America. Lupita’s character experienced the most severe beatings and trauma.  Her performance was believable and riveting.

Like the character she portrayed in the movie, Lupita was teased and rejected growing up because of the color of her skin.  So much so, she had one prayer: that God would make her skin lighter. In a recent speech she said, “The morning would come and I would be so excited about seeing my new skin that I would refuse to look down at myself before I was in front of a mirror, because I wanted to see my fair face first. And every day I experienced the same disappointment at being just as dark as I had been the day before.” 

God didn’t lighten Lupita’s skin, but rather made her dark skin an asset. Now honored throughout the world for her beauty, glamor, and acting ability her former shame has been replaced with blessing!  Isaiah 61:7-8 says, “Instead of your shame you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace you will rejoice in your inheritance.” God promises to replace our shame and disgrace with the joy of being sought after and valued.

In our recent Sunday posts we have been looking at God’s relationship with the Israelites.  The Israelites, like Lupita, suffered racial prejudice and became slaves through no fault of their own. Pharaoh, their master, was like a cruel, abusive father, often angry with Israel no matter how hard she worked to try to please him.  His demands were unreasonable, and kept changing.  Her value was based on what she could do for him.

This week at my prayer group, each of us was struggling with our own sense of value:  A father rejected relationship with his daughter - again, a mother of teens wondered what company will hire her after being a stay at home mom, and a divorcee’ is perplexed by an ex-husbands manipulative behavior.  Could you have joined in?   Are you are feeling undervalued or unappreciated? 

The good news is, like Israel, we are pursued by God.  Rather than wanting us for what we can do, He loves us unconditionally for who we are - His chosen, sought after, beloved.  When Moses presented Israel with an offer for a marriage-like relationship with God, they overwhelmingly agreed to the proposal. 

As was customary in an arranged Jewish marriage, a Bride Price was then negotiated.  The amount of the Bride Price reflected the value of the bride to the prospective bridegroom and his family.  In Exodus chapter 12, God agrees to pay the ultimate price for his bride to be, the Israelites.  What was the bride price?  The blood of a lamb. 

Moses, in preparation for the final plague, told each family to take a one-year old male lamb without any defect and slaughter it.  Then, taking its blood, they were to cover the door frames (top and sides) of their house.  God said,  12 “On that same night I will pass through Egypt and strike down every firstborn of both people and animals, and I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. I am the LORD.13 The blood will be a sign for you on the houses where you are, and when I see the blood, I will pass over you. No destructive plague will touch you when I strike Egypt.” Pharaoh and all his officials and all the Egyptians got up during the night, and there was loud wailing in Egypt, for there was not a house without someone dead.  During the night Pharaoh summoned Moses and Aaron and said, “Up!  Leave my people, you and the Israelites!  Go, worship the Lord as you have requested." (Exodus 12:12-13; 30-31 NIV) The blood of the lambs on their door frames protected the Israelites from the plague and was the Bride Price paid by God to redeem them from belonging to Pharaoh. They were saved, set free and belonged to God.

Maybe you have experienced suffering or rejection through no fault of your own.  God wants you to know that he sees, he cares, and he has a plan to rescue you.  How badly does He want you? God himself was willing to suffer incredible pain in order to be with you. The sacrificial lamb in the Passover was a for-shadow of the sacrificial death of God’s only Son.  1 Peter 1:18-19 says,  “For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.”  Jesus paid the ultimate Bride Price, death on a cross, so that you could belong to Him.  God says:  You are valued, sought after, and loved.

I have to wonder, am I moved by God’s sacrifice and tender care? Or do I take it for granted and look to him only when I need something?  Boy, if this is the case, am I not guilty of doing to him what others have done to me?  If God loves me unconditionally, for who I am and not what I can do, shouldn’t I love him back in the same way?   Let us say back to God:  You are valued, sought after and loved.

--Laurel Bahr & Marsha Craig

Telling Our Stories- Peace and Contentment

My journey to freedom started about 7 years ago.  I was 38 years old, married to a great guy, with two beautiful kids - a girl and a boy.  My faith in Christ was warm and cozy.  Life was – well, kinda perfect.  Sure there were always a few curve balls thrown in there but nothing me and my friend Jesus couldn’t get through. 

Having a heart of gratitude and trust in God is fairly easy when normal everyday life is happening.  When life throws curve balls sometimes we need to be still and re-center ourselves in our beliefs.  But occasionally we experience life altering circumstances that rock us to the core, change who we are, and make us question what and who we believe in.  It humors me now that I’m glad I got rocked, got the prize behind the curtain #3.  During that hard season of my life I never dreamt I would be able to say that. 

Jason and I had come to the conclusion that with our age and the fact that we had 2 great kids we were done growing our family.  Jason made an apt with the doctor and took permanent measures to assure our family was complete.

Well Sistah’s, not to freak your freak, but permanent procedures done by urologists who specialize in permanent procedures aren’t always guaranteed to work. 

This is where behind curtain #3 I learned what it felt like to be completely broken.  To question everything that had ever made sense to me. 

To find out you are pregnant after your husband had a vasectomy is a lot to wrap your head around and those next few weeks were kind of surreal.  From telling Jason, to setting up my doctor’s appointment, I remember thinking I just do not want to do this again.  Ugh - all those sleepless nights, then the busyness of a toddler - it all felt so overwhelming.  I spent a lot of time those early weeks praying that God would soften my heart to the idea.  I would recite in my head, “I have plans for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you, not to harm you, to give you hope and a future.”   As the weeks rolled on we shared our news with more and more people, and just as I had prayed God softened my heart.  In fact I started to really embrace the idea.  This would be the baby we laughed about - our vasectomy baby, the one that brought us much joy.

I had my first appointment with the nurse practitioner, heard the heartbeat, then set up my next appointment to see my OB and have my ultrasound.  I left that day with a smile on my face and such excitement and anticipation for what was to come. 

The day for my ultrasound finally arrived and it surprised me how drastic I changed from not wanting to be pregnant to so excited for this gift our family was about to receive.  We brought our kids to the ultrasound so they could get a glimpse of the brother or sister that was to come.  The ultrasound was magical.  It was so much fun for the kids to see the perfect little hands waving and moving around. 

We were moved to the exam room after the ultrasound where we would wait and wait and then wait some more.  I will never forget the look on Dr Fern’s face as he entered that room.  He didn’t make eye contact this time or welcome me with one of his warm hugs.  He sat down on his stool and said with such sadness in his eyes, “Your baby has profound abnormalities that are most likely not compatible with life.  You are going to need to see a specialist.” 

I left that office numb and terrified.  We spent the next several weeks seeing geneticists and specialists.  We ended up losing our baby along with so many of my dreams and nothing seemed to make sense to me anymore.  I still believed in God yet questioned his love for me.

I spent the next couple of years struggling through some depression. I knew I wouldn’t try for another baby yet wouldn’t let Jason have his permanent procedure done again.  I felt a distance from everything I believed in.  The whole “plans to prosper” verse and “I wove you together in your mother’s womb” felt like a knife in my heart and would bring anger out in me.

There is truth in the saying that time is a great healer.  Over time the intensity of my grief softened and joy started coming back.  In the spring of 2009, I was starting to feel like a me I recognized again.  I still questioned why when I was content with two kids God let me open my heart to want three.  I tried to push it out of my head.  I would tell myself if God was small enough to fully understand He wouldn’t be big enough to worship.  I would remind myself “His ways are not our ways.” 

Fast forward and buckle your seats, Sistahs!  That May I was not feeling right.  If you have been pregnant before you know the kind of right I’m talking about.  I told Jason and he said, “you’re being ridiculous, you’re on birth control!”  That felt comforting and true so I put it out of my mind.  Sunday after church we were planting our spring flowers.  I ran out of petunias so decided to run to the Rite Aid.  Without telling Jason I decided to buy pregnancy test so I could quit thinking about it and panicking.  I was then going to tell Jason I was ready for him to go back to the doctor. This was confirmation it was time to move on. 

Petunias and pregnancy test in hand, I went home.  I immediately went to the bathroom with my test.  This was so ridiculous.  I was on birth control.  I could hardly wait to get this over so I could enjoy the rest of the day.  An out of body experience is how I would describe the looking down at the test that read pregnancy positive.

I cannot begin to tell you the intense fear, horror and pain I felt.  How was this possible?  I had barely moved forward from losing our baby.  Jason came in and found me in the bedroom.  I was literally trembling with fear.  He said, “Oh my gosh, what is wrong?”  In a very calm and articulate way…ok maybe not…I sobbed and said “I’m pregnant.”  Jason held me and tried to comfort me.  He said, “It is ok.  It will be ok.  WE will be ok.”  I think he was also trying to comfort himself.

I told no one.  I was filled with so much fear, certain there would be something wrong.  I was years older now.  I felt such shame that I would put everyone through this again.  I pleaded with God to help me.  I have never felt so alone. 

Jason called Dr. Fern two weeks later and explained the situation and that he was worried about me.  Dr. Fern made an appointment for us that week.  When we arrived I felt physically ill.  It was now a place I associated with deep pain.  I couldn’t believe I was here again.  I had an ultrasound right away and Dr. Fern came in immediately after. 

When I saw Dr. Fern’s face I immediately started crying.  He gave me one of those warm, wonderful hugs.  He told me “it is early but the ultrasound looks good.”  He tried to reassure me that there was a good chance nothing was wrong.  He was a believer himself and said “Maybe this is God’s redemption for you.”  Dr. Fern is a wise man.  It was the first flicker of hope and calmness I had in weeks. 

It was a very stressful and lonely time waiting for the end of that first trimester.  Dr. Fern was sending me to the specialist to get the highest resolution ultrasound possible.  I dreaded it.  That place held such horrible and painful memories for me.  I was certain I was headed there for some experience.  I had barely slept the week before my appointment.  Walking down the long hallway, I wasn’t sure if I was going to get sick or start crying. I felt like I wanted to crawl out of my own skin. 

The appointment was long and the specialist very thorough.  He stepped out of the room and said the doctor would be back in a minute.  I laid there terrified waiting for the door to open and my life to change again.  When he walked in and said everything looked great,  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. He also said there was 90% chance it’s a girl. 

We followed up that appointment the next day with Dr. Fern. He was so happy for us.  He suggested doing an amnio since everything we had been through…and an amnio is the only test that is 100%.

I finally started sharing my news with everyone.  My family reassured me it would be good and the amnio would prove it.  I felt such gratitude to God.  I was blown away that God was going to give me this amazing gift - He was giving me the desires of my heart.  He knew I wanted a baby, but would never have tried again.  I couldn’t wait to share the goodness of God.

After the amnio, we were in the car driving to see my sister in Seattle.  We gave Dr. Fern our cell number so he could call with the results.  The phone finally rang.  My heart sped up and instantly thought he would confirm it’s a healthy girl and we would celebrate.  Jason answered the phone and began to pull the car to the side of the road.  The enthusiasm in Jason voice changed as he continued to talk.  Finally, turning to me he shook his head no. 

When Jason got off the phone he shared our baby girl would have Down’s syndrome.  I wanted to be one of those women that said, “This is my baby and I love her no matter what.”  That was not my feeling.  I was terrified.  I found myself angry again, trying to trust the God I had always loved yet wondering where He had gone. 

The rest of my pregnancy was filled with ultrasounds and lots of appointments.  I hated myself for how different I felt about this pregnancy.  Slowly as the months rolled on and I could feel her kick I began to connect with her as mine.

Heading to the hospital to deliver Lexi was such a different experience than the joy of anticipation I felt with Abby and Luke.  I think I still had hopes God would produce a miracle and she wouldn’t have Down’s syndrome. 

I only saw Lexi for a couple seconds after she was born.  They whisked her away to the NICU to start checking for all the things that can go wrong with Down’s babies.  I got to go up to the NICU that afternoon and saw her for a couple minutes.  I was awake at 3am that night and couldn’t sleep.  I called the nurse to take me up to see my baby.  It was then, when alone with my baby, I was overcome by the greatest sense of peace and contentment.  There was no doubt in my mind God meant Lexi for me and I thanked Him. 

Jan 8th, not the 1st, is always a time of reflection for me.  This past January 8th my sweet Lexi turned 4.  I am so gratefully humbled that God chose me to be her mother.  My road to being her mother was a painful one.  Yet, it has strengthened my faith beyond measure.  I now trust the plans God has for me and the character God wants to mold me into.  I have learned that God did know the desires of my heart and does have plans to prosper me and not harm me. 

Having a daughter with a disability teaches me what gifted is in God’s eyes.  We are all gifted the way God intends us to be and for His purpose.  Lexi helps me see things for what they are and accept myself the way I am.

Patient Endurance

I look up to the mountains; does my strength come from mountains?

No, my strength comes from God, who made heaven, and earth, and mountains!

Psalm 121:1-2

My son Kenney the other day surprised me with:  “Two weeks ago, we thought about going to Vegas and getting married.  We are tired of living on campus, tired of living in a dorm with all these other people around, and of course, we hate to say good-bye every night.  But after thinking about it, we decided to wait.” 

Relieved they didn’t elope, I do get it; it’s not easy to wait when you’re madly in love.  My husband Mike and I had a 3-month engagement for this reason!  Looking back, having so little time must have been tough on our folks.  I was clueless about what they did in such a short period of time until my own daughter married; we needed every bit of her 6-month engagement to get ready!

In the book of Exodus, we’re given a glimpse of how difficult it was for the Israelites to wait for their new beginning with God.  In the Old Testament, Israel is referred to as a bride and God’s covenant with them as a marriage.  As was custom for Jewish weddings in this period of time, God as the Father of the groom (Jesus Christ) extended a proposal through Moses to the Israelites who were enslaved in Egypt.  ‘I am the LORD; I will bring you out from under the burdens of the Egyptians, I will rescue you from their bondage, and I will redeem you with an outstretched arm and with great judgments. I will take you as My people, and I will be your God.”  (For more, see the last post:  Chosen)

Anxious to leave the captivity and suffering of their past behind, the Israelites enthusiastically accepted the invitation.  However the willing bride was ill prepared for what happened next.  Enraged at the thought of losing control and ownership of his slaves, Pharaoh the King of Egypt shook his fist at God and tightened his grip on the Israelites.  The result was increased hardship and suffering.

So how did the Israelites deal with their disappointment?  Exodus 6:9 says,“ Moses told the people of Israel what the LORD had said, but they refused to listen anymore. They had become too discouraged by the brutality of their slavery.”  The once willing bride couldn’t embrace the message of God’s love anymore; painful circumstances had cast a dark shadow over this truth.

Sometimes, contending for a relationship with God requires you endure unexplained suffering.  Like the Israelites, you have been born into a world that is ruled by God’s enemy.  Pharaoh gives us a picture of Satan who is an evil, harsh, demanding taskmaster.  Just as God has good plans for those he created, Satan has evil plans.  His goal is to “steal, kill and destroy”(John 10:10). When you hear the message of God’s love and respond, the enemy is naturally threatened!  He doesn’t want to lose you or give up on his plans for you.   There will be a fight because you are worth fighting for.

Many times, in a spiritual battle like this, the very thing we don’t want to do – listen - is what we need the most.  Last night on my way home from dinner with a small group of My Sistahs, I found myself discouraged.  A conversation we had stirred up some pain I’m experiencing over several key relationships in my life.  Why does life have to be so hard?   For years, I’ve done the best I can to obey God, hoping it would lead to restoration and peace.  Instead, I don’t see progress.  Like the Israelites, the faith I once had that God could do the impossible in this situation is all but gone.  Listening to my friends encourage me to walk in love didn’t feel good; I wanted to give up instead.  Sometimes letting a dream die is easier than living in the pain of hope that doesn’t materialize.  

With unwanted tears streaming down my face, I was bombarded by thoughts of truth.  It didn’t matter if I wanted to listen or not, God was in the car with me and reminded me of promises He has spoken…”in the shadow of my wings”, “the strong arm of the Lord is mighty to save”, “wait and see”, and “be still and know that I am God”.  It occurs to me that God is working on my behalf even when I can’t see it.  The outcome is not up to me; I just have to be patient and continue in God’s strength to obey.  Hebrews 10:36 says, “Patient endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s will.   Then you will receive all that he has promised.” 

Maybe you too are in a difficult chapter of life and discouraged by the direction things are heading.  Can you embrace the fact that God is fighting for you and working in ways you can’t see and don’t understand?  Will you continue to stay rooted in the truth that you are His chosen and beloved one?  Remember, our story isn’t over yet.  One day this chapter will end, and we will get to turn the page and begin a new one titled: “Victory!” 

“In that day you will sing……

 See, God has come to save me.

    I will trust in him and not be afraid.

The LORD GOD is my strength and my song;

    he has given me victory.”

Isa 12:1-2

-- Laurel Bahr

Telling Our Stories

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,

the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort,

who comforts us in all our troubles,

so that we can comfort those in any trouble

with the comfort we ourselves receive from God 

(2 Corinthians 1:3-4; NIV)

Today as I woke up, the first thing that came to mind was an image of a large tree with vast branches and full foliage.  This was immediately followed by a contrasting mental picture of a stump.  Often my first thoughts in the morning are from the Holy Spirit.  They are like bread crumbs that lead me to God’s personal word to me for the day ahead. 

Laying in bed, questions flooded my mind.  Why a tree and a stump?  Was God preparing me to be pruned?  I decided to set the notion aside.  I got my coffee grabbed my ipad, and settled onto the couch.  Thinking I am going to do my daily devotion, I turned on the tv, and had to take a peak at Pinterest first!  And while I was perusing and pinning, Rick Warren was being interviewed on The View. 

As some of you may know, Rick lost a son to suicide last year. He had come on the show to talk about the devastation he had felt and how God met him in it. And as he talked about this experience and the grief that followed, he said, “In God’s garden of grace even a broken tree will bear fruit”. Whaaaat? What did he just say?  He had my full attention. He went on to say that God wants us to use those things in our lives that we are most ashamed of, those things that have caused us the most pain, to help others.  

What would this be in my life? What is it that I wish no one knew? If truth be told, there isn’t just one…bummer. But there is one that is worse than all the rest. I, like many of you, had something happen to me that I would give anything to erase from my past. What was God telling me today? That I should be willing to help others going through the same thing? 

Rick Warren was still on while my mind was racing and mentioned he honestly didn’t know how people go through a crisis like his without God’s help. I would have to agree.  God has been there for me at every turn, through every pain. In fact, without the pain, would I have even recognized I needed him?  I have wondered this often. 

I had planned to work on the blog today. My goal is not to pick and choose the content I want to share. I want to speak God’s words.  His words alone breath life into a soul that feels dead and desperate inside. Could it be that today God wants me to write about my biggest pain, the thing I am most ashamed of? Maybe it will help you? Maybe it will help your friend, your child, or someone else you know. 

Like so many others, my earliest memories are like flashes from a horror movie. For most of my life, the worst of what happened was buried from my conscience except in the form of body memory. Phantom pain, pressures and discomfort would overcome me in the middle of the night, or during random times during the day. Because of their location and the fear that accompanied them, I grew up with a knowing that something awful had happened to me. But, honestly I had no desire to explore it. As far as I was concerned it was in the past. Why dig it up?

This was my mindset until I entered my 40’s. Then other symptoms started rising to the surface that I could not push down. I was having trouble, a lot of trouble controlling my emotions at work. No matter how hard I tried, any time I disappointed people or felt criticized, the tears came so easy. It was embarrassing to say the least. No amount of will power, reading about emotional maturity, or prayer seemed to make a difference. 

I also started having nightmares and woke my husband often screaming, “Help me!” Then the flashbacks set in:  solo images would appear unexpectedly during the day and with it nausea and thoughts like, “I can’t think about that.” In addition, I was experiencing severe depression and anxiety. I could not be with my husband intimately without wishing I could die.You may find it hard to believe, but I actually went on like this for a while, before God finally convinced me I had to face my past. 

This was over 5 years ago. After several years of intense prayer counseling, a lot of tears, many hours in God’s Word, and the help of  “my sistahs” I am experiencing freedom and wholeness from the things that happened to me all those years ago.   

My journey is like so many others. God’s business is to take the broken painful things in our life and heal them by his power. He is the doctor who can put together and restore the pieces of a broken soul. And when he does, that is quite a story! That is something that worth telling others about. Maybe there is even freedom in that! What would it look like for all of us to be wiling to open up and say the words we dread the most…”this is what happened …” and then follow them with…”but God saved me by…”

-- Laurel Bahr

Chosen

God loves you and has chosen you as his own special people.

Col 3:12 (CEV)

Bridal imagery is a metaphor used throughout the Bible.  It takes something unfamiliar, our spiritual relationship with Jesus, and compares it to something familiar that is easier for us to understand.  We can relate to the idea of falling in love, never wanting to be apart, committing ourselves to exclusive relationship, and spending the rest of our lives together. 

However, the scriptural bridal metaphor is even more meaningful if you know the ancient Jewish Wedding customs that existed during the time that the Bible was written.   Jesus taught, "The kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who arranged a marriage for his son.”  Jewish weddings were arranged; the father would choose his son’s bride.  The search usually began locally.  But if a suitable match was not found there, “a friend of the bridegroom” was sent to search for and select the bride elsewhere.  After locating the potential bride, he would describe the proposed groom, his family, and the potential marriage. If things went well, the friend of the bridegroom would finally ask the young lady if she was willing to become a bride.

This is symbolic of the method God uses to search for and select a bride for his Son Jesus.  He looks outside his own community (heaven) by sending “friends of the bridegroom” to find willing brides.  This explains why John the Baptist in the New Testament referred to himself as “the friend of the bridegroom.” He was using common bridal imagery to explain to people the mission God had given him. 

Moses is another example.  Moses was given the authority to search for and extend a proposal from God to his chosen bride:  the Israelites.  Insecure about his communication skills, he begged God to let Aaron, his brother, go with him and do the speaking.  God agreed.  When the two met with the Israelites (the potential bride), they described God and the potential marriage: “Yahweh, the God of your ancestors—the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob—has sent me to you.”  They repeated God’s words:  “I have been watching closely, and I see how the Egyptians are treating you.  I have promised to rescue you from your oppression in Egypt. I will lead you to a land flowing with milk and honey.”

God’s proposal, if accepted, would require the Israelites to “leave and cleave”:  they would leave Egypt and Pharaoh who was holding them against their will as slaves and cleave to a God they didn’t know.  Initially, when presented with this proposal from Moses, they were reluctant to believe it was possible.  One generation after another had grown up oppressed and mistreated by their powerful captors.  They had been unable to save themselves and questioned if anyone else could do it either. 

The Israelites needed to know more about God before they wanted to make a commitment. Carrying a shepherd’s staff, Moses threw it down to the ground and it turned into a snake!  Then he grabbed its tail and it turned back into the shepherd’s staff.  “Then the people of Israel were convinced that the LORD had sent Moses and Aaron. When they heard that the LORD was concerned about them and had seen their misery, they bowed down and worshiped.” They were willing to become a bride after they had witnessed God’s power.

How many Sistahs out there are like the Israelites and need to witness God’s power before accepting his proposal?  Many of us have stories of how God has done the impossible in our own lives.  When shared, God can use them to help others become a willing bride. Our Sistahs team believes this so strongly that every week on Wednesdays we post a testimony. Sharing our stories reveals God’s power, and helps others know Him better.

Mrs. Galbreath, the middle-aged Sunday school teacher I met when I was five, did that for me.  She greeted us warmly when my sister Debbie and I were dropped off at the Old White Church in our small town.  We sang songs and listened to her tell a Bible story that was illustrated on a flannel board. Told we were loved and wanted by a Father in heaven, Debbie and I both agreed to become a willing bride that day.  I didn’t know Jesus well yet, but I knew I wanted to get to know him better.

Through the years Mrs. Galbreath, a friend of the bridegroom, and I would run into each other.  Each time, the memory of the role she played in my life sparked overwhelming thankfulness.  I can’t imagine going through life without knowing Jesus, and she introduced me to Him.  She’s in heaven now.  I bet she got quite a commendation from God for her beautiful feet!

For “Everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved. But how can they call on him to save them unless they believe in him? And how can they believe in him if they have never heard about him? And how can they hear about him unless someone tells them?  And how will anyone go and tell them without being sent? That is why the Scriptures say, “How beautiful are the feet of messengers who bring good news!” Rom 10:10-15; NLT

Sistah, do you want to have beautiful feet?  Share your own story about God’s power in your life. Speak it out!  Send it to us!! God wants to use it to encourage others.  In this way, you too can be “a friend of the bridegroom” and have beautiful feet.

Plan B

“I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord,

“plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

 plans to give you hope and a future.”

Jeremiah 29:11

I got a call from my friend Lauren the other night. She had been at an Open Mic Night for Singles at her church and she had met a guy. I got all excited!! Ever since I have known her we have wondered together about our future husbands. We would talk about our “must haves”:  love Jesus, have a job, love family, be funny and want kids. And we would also talk about our “nice to haves”:   tall, attractive, with no criminal record, and Lauren preferred no baby-mama drama. While I eventually met my husband, she has yet to meet hers.

I could tell on the phone she was still taking it in. She was “hospitalitizing” (her own word, meaning helping to serve food for the event), when Matthew came up at the end of the night and offered to help clean up. Acts of service just scream Lauren’s love language, so it was love at first chore.

While they were talking, the pastor’s wife came by and they joked for a minute.  She seemed to know him well and like him.  He was white, and wittily snuck in that he liked chocolate girls, which was great because that is what she is. “I could tell he loved Jesus, but wasn’t one of those fake, overly religious, too holy for his own good kind of guys” she said. Afterward he walked her to her car, even opened her door for her, and asked for her number. She liked his chivalry.

While on the phone with Lauren, I was sure to let her know that I was going to be praying about Matthew.  I liked the sound of him already. I checked out his Facebook page, which was flooded with his love for God (a “must have!”) and also showed that he was decent looking (a “nice to have”).   I could tell that he and Jesus were tight, and he wanted everyone to know. I liked that.  I was even happy he was white, as we could take some really cute couples’ pictures later on with Fred and I and the two of them. 

The next day I got a text from Lauren that Matthew wasn’t going to work out. I was surprised to hear that so soon. It had only been one day! She went on to say that she googled him and found out that he is a registered sex offender. Devastated, Lauren went on to tell me that after meeting Matthew she found herself longing for a relationship.  Prior to this night she was content with being single and waiting on God for a husband. Starting her Master’s degree took much of her focus; having a boyfriend was still a desire, but it was not at the forefront.  But now that the hope was awakened, it was hard not to think about whether it would ever happen.

She said “It is one of those things - out of sight, out of mind.” Lauren related it to being on a diet. When someone sets potato chips in front of you, you long more for potato chips than you did before they were in your view. “The possibility of a relationship was in front of me, and therefore I found myself longing for one, even though it wasn’t with that person.”

While Lauren is still feeling discouraged about her relationship status, she knows God has a Master Plan. She believes that God has placed that longing in her heart to be married and that if she trusts Him, He will take care of it. She knows this because of the close relationship she has with him.  She can also see how God spared her from more pain by allowing her to know early on about Matthew’s past.

When we are discouraged by our own failed plans in our jobs, our living situation, our finances, or our relationship status, can we continue to trust that God’s plan is good even while we wait.

In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.”  Proverbs 16:9

--Kelsey Amusavi